As he developed his leadership capacity one of the areas that Timothy needed to learn was the discipline of self-control. Consider these instructions from Paul to the young leader:  

I thank God, whom I serve, as my ancestors did, with a clear conscience, as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy (2 Timothy 1:3–4, NIV).

Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will (2 Timothy 2:25–26).

Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly (2 Timothy 2:16).

Have nothing to do with godless myths and old wives tales; rather, train yourself to be godly” (1 Timothy 4:7).

These passages reveal three areas in which Timothy learned self-control.

Timothy learned to control his temper.  

Paul remembers Timothy’s tears and urges him to instruct “gently” when he would be tempted to lash out in anger.  Sorrow and anger are two of the many emotions that every leader faces. Paul does not rebuke Timothy for these emotions, but tenderly encourages self-control, one of the fruits of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22-23). Anger is perhaps one of the most potentially destructive emotions for leaders. No one wants to follow a leader who cannot control their temper and a lack of self-control in this area has hindered the effectiveness of many leaders.   A temper out of control is a leadership nightmare.

But serving leaders both acknowledge and control their emotions. They are not afraid to reveal their tears and they learn to keep their anger from being destructive.  They acknowledge that they can’t serve others when they lose their temper.  

Timothy learned to control his tongue.   

We have already observed Paul’s instruction for Timothy to instruct his opponents “gently”. Paul recognized that it requires great self-control to speak gently when there is direct opposition! The tongue often verbally expresses the anger in the heart and will not lead to the repentance encouraged by a gentle tongue. Paul also warns Timothy against “godless chatter….godless myths and old wives tales..” He is referring broadly to speech that is not helpful. While words spoken in anger are obviously harmful, other speech is simply not helpful and Paul cautions Timothy to control his tongue so as to avoid this kind of speech. Many leaders have tongues that are as unpredictable as the weather and are more harmful than helpful. But serving leaders seek to control what comes out of their mouths so that it is never harmful and always helpful.

Timothy learned to control his time.   

Part of Paul’s instruction to Timothy to “avoid godless chatter” and “old wives tales” is a direct challenge for him to use his time well. Here and in other places Paul urged Timothy to be diligent in focusing his time and attention to the things that matter and to avoid distractions. In some cases Paul urged Timothy to “Come quickly” while at other times not to be “hasty” (see 1 Timothy 5:22 and 2 Timothy 4:9). Timothy had to learn to manage his time well. If these instructions were given today we might hear Paul say, “Don’t waste your time on useless conversations and following the latest controversies on social media!” Many leaders allow the tyranny of the urgent to keep them from the most effective use of their time. Serving leaders learn to control their schedule so that they are doing the things that best bring value to those they serve.

For further reflection and discussion:

• Which of these three areas (temper, tongue and time) are most difficult for me to control right now? Reflect on the question below for that area:

*Temper. When have I lost my temper in leadership and how did it impact my influence with others?

*Tongue. In what way do I use my tongue in ways that are not helpful for those I lead? What do I need to do to more fully allow God to help me develop self-control in this area?

*Time. What are my greatest time wasters? What do I need to do to develop greater self-control in this area?

• Reflect on those you lead. How do I encourage them to develop control of themselves that goes far beyond obeying external instructions? Which of these three areas should I be talking about with my key leaders?        
• In addition to the verses we used in this issue, consider the following: 1 Timothy 5:22; 2 Timothy 2:4; 4:2, 9-12, 21. What additional insights do you find from these verses about how Timothy learned self-control?           

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll look at how Timothy became a role model to others.

Timothy was a young man, eager to save the world as he joined his mentor, Paul. But along the way he learned that leadership is not all about action. Leadership certainly involves the actions leaders take as well as the heart and motives underneath the actions. But leadership also includes the mind, thinking, pondering, and reflecting. These are things that Timothy would learn on his own journey. Consider these instructions Paul gave Timothy.  

Reflect on what I am saying, for the Lord will give you insight into all this (2 Timothy 2:7, NIV).  

But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry. 2 Timothy 4:5 (NIV)  

Paul calls Timothy to “reflect” and to “keep your head.” Timothy needed to learn how to think as a leader, spending time learning the importance of reflection and thought. His example teaches serving leaders to understand the power and practice of reflection.  

Reflection releases insight.    

Paul tells Timothy that reflection will produce insight. Paul could have simply told Timothy the insight, but he wanted Timothy to develop the capacity to reflect and gain his own insight! The muscle of reflection needed to be exercised for Timothy to gain insight.  Reflection takes a leader out of the immediate tasks and allows thought on the bigger picture. Reflection allows a leader to gain insight that helps them lead. This insight may be a needed change of direction or a clearer focus on current priorities. It may be a greater self-awareness as the leader reflects on their own leadership actions and how their leadership impacts others. The insight might be a new thought that helps solve a perplexing challenge.  The insights gained ultimately benefit the entire organization and in this regard reflection is one of the greatest gifts a leader can give to those they lead. 

Many leaders lead with little insight! Others seek insight from many places, perhaps good sources, but which are still shortcuts to the discipline of reflection. But serving leaders gain insight as they take time to step away and reflect. They don’t think they’re leading unless they’re thinking!  

Reflection results in stability. 

Paul calls Timothy to “keep your head in all situations.” He is urging Timothy to be a stable leader one who would not rush in many directions at the same time or change course at the slightest obstacle. He needed to keep his head straight! Reflection brings stability to leadership. Leaders who don’t stop to reflect often change course erratically with little thought to how it impacts those they are leading. They learn that leading only with action often produces a reaction! But serving leaders stop and reflect, then lead from a position of calmness and stability.  

Reflection requires time.  

Reflection has great benefits but is a discipline that requires time. Reflection requires a pause, stepping back from normal activities and thinking deeply and pondering.  Reflection cannot be rushed or squeezed into the margins of our day. This is a challenge for leaders with the many demands on their time. There are pressing tasks that need to be done, objectives that must be met, people to see and places to go! In this environment it is hard to stop and reflect. It may seem to be a waste of time. So, the discipline of reflection, like all leadership disciplines, must be intentional and planned in the calendar.    

Many leaders don’t take time to stop working to think and reflect. They press on with the work they are doing with no time to reflect on the work. But serving leaders understand that the benefits of reflection outweigh the costs and they build time for reflection in their leadership rhythms.  

For further reflection and discussion: 

• How can I develop the discipline of reflection in my own life? Do I have time in my daily, weekly, quarterly, and annual rhythms to pause and reflect? How can I improve my reflection time?  
• Reflect on those you lead. What can I do to encourage them to develop their own ability to reflect?  Do I invite them to reflect for insight as Paul did to Timothy, or do I too quickly share my own insight with them? How would they answer this question?       
• Would others describe my leadership as “stable” or “inconsistent” and what impact does that have on my leadership?   

• In addition to the verses we used in this issue, consider the following: 1 Timothy 4:2,15–16, 2 Timothy 1:13-14. What additional insights do you find from these verses about how Timothy learned to reflect on the instructions Paul gave him?   

(In this series we are looking at the life of Timothy. If you haven’t already, this is a great time to read through the two books in the Bible with his name, written to him by Paul. As you read, reflect on what Timothy did to grow as a leader and how his actions apply to your own growth.)   

Until next time, yours on the journey, 

Jon Byler 

In the next issue, we’ll look at things Timothy learned to leave behind.  

One of the greatest ways Barnabas served the early church was simply being available. Several times his story includes a situation where he was sent by the church leaders to fulfill a specific mission. He was first sent by the apostles to the new church in Antioch.  

News of this reached the church in Jerusalem, and they sent Barnabas to Antioch (Acts 11:22, NIV).

Then Barnabas was sent to safely deliver a financial gift.   

²⁹The disciples, as each one was able, decided to provide help for the brothers and sisters living in Judea. ³⁰This they did, sending their gift to the elders by Barnabas and Saul (Acts 11:29-30).

Later, as we have already seen, he was sent with Paul on the first missionary journey.

So after they had fasted and prayed, they placed their hands on them and sent them off (Acts 13:3).

When the church council met to debate a contentious issue, Barnabas was sent, along with others, to deliver their decision to the Gentile churches.

Then the apostles and elders, with the whole church, decided to choose some of their own men and send them to Antioch with Paul and Barnabas. They chose Judas (called Barsabbas) and Silas, men who were leaders among the believers (Acts 15:22).

We often think of leaders as the ones who look for people to send to accomplish tasks. But Barnabas shows us that serving leaders are available to be sent.  His posture was one of being available as needed and where needed. Serving leaders learn from his example how to serve by being available.  

Availability serves others by the surrender of program.

Barnabas was available to be sent and again and again gave up his own program to serve others. He gave a most precious gift for a leader, time! He likely had his own schedule before he was sent, but he surrendered that to advance the mission of the team. Serving leaders guard their time carefully, but they learn from Barnabas not to use it selfishly. They are willing to surrender their program to meet the needs of another. They are not intimidated or diminished by being sent. They serve by being available.  

Availability serves others by the surrender of proficiency.   

Barnabas was available to serve with the gifts and talents he brought to the team. He was an encourager and was sent to encourage. He was wise, so was sent to deliver sensitive information. He was dependable, so was sent to carefully handle finances. He was highly proficient as a leader, but deliberately made his gifts available to serve the team. Serving leaders bring their gifts to serve the team, not to build their own credentials. They make their gifts available as needed for the mission. They serve by being available.  

Availability serves others by the surrender of plans.  

Barnabas was not an idle leader with no plans. But he was continually willing to lay down his own dreams and ambitions for the sake of others on the team. This did not diminish his leadership capacity but rather focused it on the needs of others rather than self. Serving leaders are not afraid to surrender their own plans for the advancement of the team. They serve by being available.

For further reflection and discussion:

• How does the availability of Barnabas challenge me as a leader? What action can I take this week to be more like him?
• Do I have any flexibility in my program/schedule to be available for the needs of others? What do I need to change in the way I manage my time to create opportunities to be available?
• Do I see the skills and gifts that I possess as resources to be used for myself or for the sake of others? How can I make them available in service to others?
• Am I willing to lay down my own dreams and plans for the sake of others? What makes it hard for me to surrender these plans? What step can I take in my own leadership to lay down my plans for the team?              

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll look at how Barnabas served with humility.

Leaders work hard and they make things happen. They are people of action! But effective leaders also recognize that thinking about their work is a part of their work. They realize that what they think impacts what they do. Paul challenges leaders to pay attention to the focus of their thinking.

⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things (Philippians 4:8, NIV).

 Paul instructs us to “think about such things.” Serving leaders ask themselves “What am I thinking?” for several reasons.

Serving leaders ask, “What am I thinking?” to ensure thinking time.

Paul calls for thinking about our thinking! He wants to make sure that we take some time to think. While thinking does not look like an active exercise, serving leaders recognize that thinking time is not unproductive, wasted time. Leaders need to stop and think. They need to step back and gain perspective. They need to reflect on the past, evaluate the present and envision the future. They ask themselves first, “Am I thinking?” “Do I have time scheduled that allows me to focus on thinking?” Serving leaders recognize that serving does not always mean engaging in the work. They step away from the work to think about the work.

Serving leaders ask, “What am I thinking?” to focus thinking time.

Paul calls us to think on “these things.” He provides a list of things that are “excellent and praiseworthy” to think about. Thinking time is helpful, but if the focus of the time is in the wrong direction, it will not be profitable. Not all thinking time is equal. There are some areas in which the serving leader can focus his/her thoughts that will bring greater return to the organization. These may involve planning for the future, reflecting on ways to more effectively delegate tasks and responsibilities, reflecting on the context in which he/she leads and how changes in the context impact the direction of the organization, thinking about ways to greater leverage strengths, etc. Serving leaders focus their thinking on things that bring positive results.

Serving leaders ask, “What am I thinking?” to explain their thinking time.

Serving leaders think about their thinking so that they can explain to others what they are thinking. They serve those they lead by sharing with them the things about which they are thinking. They deliberately share what they are thinking and why they are thinking. All who hear what the leader is thinking benefit from better understanding the heart and mind of the leader and the direction he/she is moving.  They also learn how leaders think which raises their own thinking capacity. Some who listen will sharpen the leaders’ thinking and bring additional ideas that improve the thinking process. Others in the organization need to know what the leader is thinking so that they can help carry out the needed actions. Serving leaders not only think; they serve their teams by sharing what they are thinking.

Take a minute to think about these things!

For further reflection and discussion:

• Do I have time to think? What do I need to do to ensure that there is some thinking time in my calendar? What time of the day do I do my best thinking?   What location is most conducive to productive thinking?
• When I think, where is the focus of my thoughts? Do I tend to think about positive or negative things? Do I focus on strengths or weaknesses? What impact does this have on my leadership? What do I need to strengthen and when will I do it?
• How well and how often do I explain to others what I am thinking? Do I encourage others to sharpen my thoughts and bring their own ideas to the process?  Do those I expect to implement my ideas fully understand what I’m thinking and why it matters? Am I helping those around me grow in their own thinking capacity?  

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll examine the related question serving leaders ask others: “What are you thinking?”

Leaders often develop plans and strategies for what they could accomplish and they start running towards the goal.  But serving leaders don’t ask what they could start doing, but what they should start doing. They again carefully observe Paul’s instructions.  

²²You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; ²³to be made new in the attitude of your minds; ²⁴and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4:22-24, NIV). Paul talks first about what needs to be “put off” or stopped. We looked at this with the question, “What should I stop doing?” When progress is made in this area, serving leaders now have some margin in their time and can move to Paul’s instruction to “put on the new self” by asking another question of themselves, “What should I start doing?” Serving leaders should start (or do more in) at least three areas.   

It is always right to ask…and to do more in three areas..  

Serving leaders ask “What should I start doing?“ to focus on leading instead of doing.    

All leaders rise to leadership positions because they are effective at accomplishing tasks, they know how to get the work done! But as serving leaders rise in leadership, they recognize that they need to start focusing on leading others instead of doing these tasks. A mental shift is required for them to put down the ‘tools’ they have learned to use so well and focus on leading others well. Paul talks about changing the “attitude of your minds” before he talks about what needs to be “put on”. As serving leaders stop doing the work themselves, they start doing more and more leadership. They spend more time working on the company than in the company. Serving leaders look at their calendar to evaluate how much time they spend leading vs. doing tasks. Then they adjust their calendar until the focus is on leading well.  

Serving leaders ask “What should I start doing?“  to do what brings greatest return.  

Effective leaders recognize that not all their leadership actions bring equal results to their organization. When they stop doing some things that bring less return, they are able to start doing more of the things that bring maximum impact. A serving leader may recognize that strategic thinking is one of the best things she can do for the organization, so she begins setting aside blocks of time for thinking. Another may determine that their greatest impact is keeping their vision clearly focused and widely understood. As a result, he starts allocating more time to work at communicating the vision to the organization. Serving leaders work hard to determine their priorities and start doing more of what matters most.  

Serving leaders ask “What should I start doing?“ to better develop their gifts.  

As leaders learn to say ‘no’ to the areas in which they are not gifted or which should be delegated to others, they find that they are able to focus more clearly on the areas of their strengths. This means that they will do more of what they are best at doing. Serving leaders also start deliberately developing their gift. This happens as they set aside time, not to exercise their strength, but to sharpen it. They start spending time reading about areas of their strength, talking with a trusted mentor, and learning from others who have excelled in that area. They take time to develop their gift.  

For further reflection and discussion: 

• Before I look at what I should start, have I stopped the things that I should not be doing so that I have some space for new areas of growth? (If not, review the previous issues!)  
• What percentage of my current time is spent on leadership actions and what percentage is spent doing the work? What would be ideal for me right now in my position? What will I do to move towards that goal?  
• Of all the things I do as a leader, what three or four things brings the greatest return to my organization? What can I do to start doing more of these things?  
• What area of personal strength can I focus on to develop? What steps can I take to develop this strength? When will I begin?  

Until next time, yours on the journey, 

Jon Byler 

In the next issue, we’ll look at the related question serving leaders ask others: “What should you start doing?”  

All leaders delegate tasks to others in their quest to accomplish the vision, adding items to their “to do” lists.  But serving leaders stop the delegation process long enough to ask a different question of their followers: “What should you stop doing?” They learn from Jethro, the father-in-law of Moses.

¹³ The next day Moses took his seat to serve as judge for the people, and they stood around him from morning till evening. ¹⁴ When his father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he said, “What is this you are doing for the people? Why do you alone sit as judge, while all these people stand around you from morning till evening?” (Exodus 18:13-14, NIV, read 13-27, below, for a fuller context.) Jethro was kindly asking Moses to think about what he was doing that he needed to stop. Moses was doing a great thing; he was serving the nation! He was busy from “morning to evening” doing what he thought his job description called him to do. Everyone around looked at him with admiration and respect as a great leader. But Jethro steps forward and asks some hard questions that quickly shape Moses’ leadership journey. Serving leaders do the same for those they lead.

Serving leaders ask “What should you stop doing?” to avoid burnout.

Jethro explains to Moses that if he would stop doing some of the things he was doing, he would be “able to stand the strain” (Exodus 18:23). Moses was working hard but would not be able to sustain the pace of his leadership. Jethro was concerned that Moses would not be able to sustain the pace at which he was working. Serving leaders want the best for those they lead. They see those who follow not as machines for continuous production but as individuals who are gifted but with very human limitations! Serving leaders don’t push people beyond healthy capacity. Instead, they learn to also ask those they lead, “What should you stop doing so that you will avoid burnout?”  

Serving leaders ask “What should you stop doing?“ to focus on strengths.

Jethro advises Moses that when he distributes the load, he will be able to focus on the difficult cases only. He would be able to use his strengths in the best way to serve the nation. Leaders who are busy from morning to evening are most likely not serving in the areas of their greatest strengths. Instead, they are doing lots of good things on their “to do” list but not focused on key things that only they can do. Serving leaders repeat Jethro’s question to those they lead to help them think critically about their greatest strengths. They ask, “What should you stop doing that is not your greatest strength?” Their question provokes thinking and perhaps even a change in job description that frees a person to serve in the areas for which they are best suited.  

Serving leaders ask “What should you stop doing?“ to develop others.

Jethro asked Moses why he was working alone “while all these people stand around.” He recognized that as long as Moses did all the work, the others would not be developed. They had gifts and abilities which were not being used. Jethro asks Moses to give up some work so that others could grow up! Serving leaders not only consider what things they should stop doing, but they turn to those who follow and ask them, “Who else could do what you are doing now? When will you stop doing that so that others will grow?”

They ask instead of telling because they want the person, they lead to think for themselves and grow in their own ability to lead themselves. They may also ask because, unlike Jethro, it may not be as clear what things on the to do list are causing burnout.

For further reflection and discussion:

Choose one of the highest achievers on your team to think about. Who is that person? Choose specific questions from the list below to prepare for your time with that person. Then meet with them and serve them by asking what you have on your list.

• What things are you doing which wear you out?
• What do you need to stop doing to have a healthy balance in your life?
• Is your present pace sustainable long term? If not, what do you need to stop doing?
• Of all you do for this organization, what do you do that best uses your strengths?
• Of the tasks you do on a regular basis, which ones are not in the areas of your greatest strength? How can you stop doing them?
• Which of your current tasks could be done by someone else? What is needed for you to pass that task on to them?
• What happens to those under you when you continue doing the same tasks over time? Are you allowing their potential to be realized?  

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll examine the next question serving leaders ask themselves: “What should I start doing?”

Here is the full story of Jethro’s advice to Moses.

¹³ The next day Moses took his seat to serve as judge for the people, and they stood around him from morning till evening. ¹⁴ When his father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he said, “What is this you are doing for the people? Why do you alone sit as judge, while all these people stand around you from morning till evening?”

¹⁵ Moses answered him, “Because the people come to me to seek God’s will. ¹⁶ Whenever they have a dispute, it is brought to me, and I decide between the parties and inform them of God’s decrees and instructions.”

¹⁷ Moses’ father-in-law replied, “What you are doing is not good. ¹⁸ You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. ¹⁹ Listen now to me and I will give you some advice, and may God be with you. You must be the people’s representative before God and bring their disputes to him. ²⁰ Teach them his decrees and instructions, and show them the way they are to live and how they are to behave. ²¹ But select capable men from all the people—men who fear God, trustworthy men who hate dishonest gain—and appoint them as officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. ²² Have them serve as judges for the people at all times, but have them bring every difficult case to you; the simple cases they can decide themselves. That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. ²³ If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.”

²⁴ Moses listened to his father-in-law and did everything he said. ²⁵ He chose capable men from all Israel and made them leaders of the people, officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. ²⁶ They served as judges for the people at all times. The difficult cases they brought to Moses, but the simple ones they decided themselves.

²⁷ Then Moses sent his father-in-law on his way, and Jethro returned to his own country.  (Exodus 18: 13-27, NIV)

Leaders are people of action and most have a long list of things they plan to do to change their world. But serving leaders also stop and ask themselves what they are doing which they should stop!  

Paul provides these instructions to all Christians, ²²You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; ²³to be made new in the attitude of your minds; ²⁴and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4:22-24, NIV).  Paul’s instructions tell us that a part of our Christian growth is to stop doing some things and begin doing other things. He provides several examples in the following verses (25-32)—stop lying, start speaking truth; stop stealing, start working to bless others; stop unwholesome talk, start meeting the needs of others with your tongue. While these actions relate to spiritual growth serving leaders learn to look at their actions to see what needs to be “put off” or stopped. They do this for three reasons.  

Serving leaders ask “What should I stop doing?“ to clarify priorities.  

Paul’s command to “put off” relates to things which are always wrong to do. Wrong actions clearly should be stopped! Leaders, however, often face an additional dilemma. Of several good things which could be done, which one should I do? Serving leaders learn to stop doing some things so that they can focus on things which are a higher priority. They say ‘no’ to the less important to say ‘yes’ to the most important. They recognize that serving others often means saying “no.”  

Serving leaders ask “What should I stop doing?“ to increase productivity.  

Serving leaders recognize that they have limitations with their time. They cannot physically continue to do more and more. As activity and responsibilities increase it becomes harder to focus on the task at hand and productivity decreases. Leaders who continually accept new responsibilities without a corresponding end to others find themselves in a frantic struggle to do more and more. They are soon fatigued physically and mentally and are not able to bring their best selves to the task at hand. Serving leaders learn to look at their tasks on a regular basis and ask what they should stop doing. If the tasks do not actually need to be done, they simply stop. If they need to be done but should be done by someone else, they delegate to others. As serving leaders stop doing the things they should not do, they are able to productively do the things they should be doing.  

Serving leaders ask “What should I stop doing?“ to empower others.  

Leaders often do many things that could be effectively done by others. They justify their actions with convincing arguments that they do them well, they are working hard and that the activities are a part of their job description. But serving leaders recognize that when they continue doing things that others on their team could do, they not only diminish their own effectiveness but they stunt the growth and development of others. When they deny others the opportunity to grow, leaders place themselves in a vicious cycle of unending responsibility. Serving leaders learn to ask themselves what they should stop doing to identify areas that could be passed on to others. They slow down enough to ask the question, and then make a plan of how effective delegation can be done. If training is needed, they put that on their ‘to do’ list. Serving leaders learn to keep a “not to do list” next to their “to do list.”  

For further reflection and discussion: 

• What is on my “to do” list that are not high priorities for my role as a leader? (Begin a “not to do list.”) 
• What things am I currently doing, that keep me from being fully productive? (Add them to the list you started above.)  
• What things am I currently doing which others on my team could do either immediately or with proper training and empowerment? (Add them to your list.)  

• Now look at your list and decide what needs to be done for each item. If it is not essential to accomplish your vision, simply stop doing it! If it is something that someone else should be doing, put their name next to the item. Then indicate whether they are ready for the task or need training to be ready. Where training is needed, indicate when you will do that and add that time to your “to do” list. Use the chart below if helpful.  

Until next time, yours on the journey, 

Jon Byler 

In the next issue, we’ll examine the related question serving leaders ask others:  ‘What should you stop doing?” 

“Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, (1Timothy 3:2).

The fourth quality Paul lists as essential for those who desire to lead like Christ is “self-controlled.” He recognized that before seeking to exert influence over others, the leader must be able to exercise self-control. Self-control will be expressed in the life of a servant leader in three key areas.

Servant leaders control their time.

Leaders have the same amount of time as everyone else, but they learn to manage their time well. Servant leaders recognize that time is a gift from God, given to allow them to accomplish His purposes for their lives. Therefore they are passionate about using their time in His way. They are diligent to prioritize and work efficiently. But they acknowledge that God wants more than achievement. They balance time for doing and time for being. They invest time in building strong relationships as well as completing tasks. They honor God’s plan for Sabbath rest even when the demands of work and family are high. They take time for personal growth and development to better fulfill God’s purposes for their lives and leadership.

Servant leaders control their tongue.

Effective leaders understand the words of Solomon, “The tongue has the power of life and death” (Prov. 18:21). In public and private the words of a leader impact many either for good or bad. Servant leaders have a genuine desire to bless others and make a positive impact in their lives. Therefore, they work diligently to eliminate all lies, gossip, idle talk, slander and harsh instructions from their tongue. They value relationships but strive to follow Paul’s instruction to “speak the truth in love” (Eph. 4:15). They honor confidential information and resist the temptation to exaggerate. They honor their spoken commitments above the law.

Servant leaders control their temper.

Leaders have the same emotions as followers. Servant leaders acknowledge and appropriately express their emotions but recognize that if their emotions are not predictable, people will find it difficult to trust their leadership. Anger is one of the first emotions to be expressed and leaders are often in situations where they are blamed or attacked. Servant leaders learn that words spoken in anger and decisions made in an angry moment quickly undermine their ability to lead like Jesus.

The term self-control may imply that these things can be done with enough willpower. While servant leaders strive to evidence self-control, this character trait is not something we manufacture with our own effort. Servant leaders do not need another ‘self-help’ book urging them to try harder to be good. Paul notes that self-control is one of the evidences of the Spirit’s work in our lives (See Gal. 5:23). Servant leaders yield control to the work of the Spirit in their lives and enjoy the fruit of self-control.

Too often self-control is noted when it is absent and flaws are exposed. Samson was a leader who failed in this area. He was called, gifted and filled with God’s Spirit. But he repeatedly acted impulsively and allowed his passions to control his actions rather than exercising self-control. This sabotaged his leadership potential and his leadership is a tragic example of why Paul calls us to be self-controlled.

For further reflection and discussion:

Take a few moments to reflect on your own life. In which of the three areas mentioned in this issue (time, tongue, temper) do you most need God’s help? Work through the questions below for the one you identify.

• Time. Reflect on these scriptures as you respond to the following questions: Ps. 90:12; Eph. 5:15-16 (KJV); Acts 21:5; Exodus 20:8-11; Mark 6:31. How well do I use time to accomplish God’s plan for my life? Do I get adequate rest for my body? Do I spend too much or too little time on building relationships? What is my plan for honoring the principle of Sabbath rest?
• Tongue. Read Eph. 4:29. What areas of ‘unwholesome talk’ come out of my mouth? Which ones are most damaging to my relationships? What is the root attitude in my heart that leads to sin with my tongue? What percentage of my talk builds others up and what can I do to improve? As a leader how can I encourage a culture of speaking ‘truth in love’ among my followers? Is there a commitment I have made recently which I have not honored?
• Temper. Read James 1:19-20 and Prov. 29:22. Reflect on the most recent time you became angry. How did you express it and what was the impact of your actions on others? Do you need to ask forgiveness from those toward whom you have been angry?

So the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth of Elul, in fifty-two days. (Nehemiah 6:15) In less than two months’ time the wall was complete. The recording of this time is significant not only in the fact that it happened quickly but in the reality that it took time before the dream that Nehemiah had in the palace became a physical reality. As we come near the end of Nehemiah’s story, let’s reflect on ways his vision took time to develop and learn how servant leaders use time to accomplish their visions.

Visions take time to conceive.

When we began the story of Nehemiah we noted that he received a message from men who had visited Jerusalem and came back with their report. Nehemiah was deeply moved by the needs in the city of his forefathers and took time to think, reflect and most of all to pray about the situation. Slowly, the needs of his people became a personal call to involvement and his heart was stirred with a vision to build the wall. Nehemiah took time to receive the vision.

Many visions are never fulfilled because the leader does not allow enough time for the vision to form fully. Servant leaders acknowledge that God is the giver of visions and that it takes time for them to fully comprehend what He wants to do through their lives.

Visions take time to construct.

After Nehemiah received the vision to build the wall, he took time to think and to develop a plan before he approached the king. Then he shared the vision with the king and asked permission to travel to Jerusalem. The journey took a couple of months and then Nehemiah took more time on the ground to refine his plan before he was ready to communicate the vision.

Some visions are aborted because the leader rushes through the planning process and has only a half-formed idea of the direction before rushing into action. Servant leaders take time to carefully and prayerfully construct a plan.

Visions take time to communicate.

Nehemiah waited for the right time to communicate his vision to the people of Jerusalem. He didn’t want to prematurely talk about the dream before his plan was complete and before he sensed that the people were ready to embrace the vision. Then he took enough time to tell them what was in his heart and what God had already done to confirm the vision. As the work continued, he took more time to share the vision, refocus the workers in the face of opposition and encourage those who grew weary.

Some visions never materialize because the leader expects everyone to get on board after a three minute presentation! Servant leaders slow down and communicate again and again.

Visions take time to complete.

Obviously, the physical work on the wall was a big job and took time to complete. To the astonishment of supporters and enemies, it was completed in record time. Time spent in planning and communication pays off in reduced time for execution. As visions go, Nehemiah’s was a relatively short term vision. But as the wall was completed he realized that more building was needed for the people to fully experience all of God’s plans for their spiritual and social life. The initial vision expanded to include a more holistic plan which took much longer than two months to complete.

Leaders often underestimate the time needed to complete the work on the vision. What is crystal clear in their minds appears to be a quick job to complete. Servant leaders recognize that even with God’s blessing and direction working with people to accomplish God’s vision is the work of a lifetime.

Servant leaders view time as a precious gift of God, given to accomplish His vision. They do not frantically rush to conquer self-imposed deadlines, nor do they ignore the passing of time. Like Nehemiah, they carefully use time to accomplish their vision. Don’t rush your vision. Give it time.

For further reflection and discussion:

• How does my culture view time and in what ways it is consistent/inconsistent with God’s view of time? (Ask yourself if your culture most values tasks or relationships, whether you think in terms of deadlines or assume that there will always be a tomorrow.) What adjustments do you need to make to lead like Jesus?
• Have I allowed time for the vision to develop in my heart? To plan completely and communicate to others? Do I have a realistic view of how long it will actually take to achieve the vision? If not, what changes is God inviting me to make?
• Have I become discouraged with how long it is taking to accomplish the vision? What have I learned from Nehemiah that can encourage me to continue?

In the last issue we examined ways that servant leaders view time differently. With that foundation, let’s look at some practical steps every leader can take to better manage time. Paul writes that we are to ‘redeem the time’ (Col. 4:5). To redeem is to buy back or reclaim that which is gone or to rescue from loss. Both are appropriate pictures of what leaders are called to do with time. How can servant leaders redeem the time?

Develop a “to do” list.

Before you can get things done you must know what needs to be done. You can do this very easily by keeping a notebook or diary in which you list the things you need to do. Make different categories on your list or use different pages to separate the items into areas that are relevant for you. Your categories might include: Home, Work, Town, Church, etc. Under each category list the things that you need to do. This might include calls to make to different people, items to purchase from the supermarket, or chores to do at home. Servant leaders develop this list prayerfully, seeking to know God’s purposes for their time.

Take time to plan.

A few minutes of planning will enable you to be much more organized and effective in what needs to be done for the day. Start this process with a daily plan. Take five minutes each morning to think through the day. Look at your “to do” list to help you remember the things that are important. Then decide when you are going to do the ones for that day and how long each should take. Don’t just look at ‘tasks,’ remember to plan time for rest, for worship, for family, and for exercise.

Deal with “time wasters.”

Time wasters are those things that keep us from using our time in the way that most honors God. Before we know it, some time has been ‘spent’ and God’s purposes for that time have not been accomplished. Common ‘time wasters’ are electronics (TV, cell phones, computers, internet, video games, etc.), sports, travel, waiting, people!, etc. These things are certainly not always wrong, but without care, they can quickly steal precious minutes or hours from our life. Identify one or two that are most critical for your life.

Seize the minutes.

Learn how to make every minute count. A minute looks insignificant but if you can only learn to recover 30 minutes from your daily schedule you will add 182 hours to your year (that’s more than one week!); in 40 years you will add 300+ days! Start using those small amounts of time when you are waiting for a vehicle, waiting in line, expecting a visitor who is late, time between appointments, tea break, and hundreds of others. Use those minutes to read a few pages of a book, write a note to a friend, make a call, memorize a verse of scripture, or plan your schedule. The point is not so much what you do as that you start doing something with those moments.

Track your time usage.

If you are serious about using your time effectively as a servant leader, take the step of recording how you use your time for one week. This simple exercise can open your eyes to what is actually happening with your time.

Go ahead, grab back some of those moments that so quickly slip away. As you “redeem the time” you more fully reflect the leadership of Jesus.

For further reflection and discussion:

• What is the impact in the lives of others when I do not use my time well?
• What are the biggest “time wasters” in my life? What do I need to do to change?
• How consistently do I plan? What can I do to strengthen my time of planning?
• Have I evaluated my use of time for at least one week? What did I learn from this exercise and how will it help me grow as a leader?
• How can I help those around me more effectively manage their time?