Failure is an inevitable reality of every leader’s journey, but learning to make failure fruitful requires deliberate effort. In the previous issue, we looked at the first principle of “FAILS” from the life of David: Find a new definition of failure. Now, we’ll look at how to Accept responsibility for your failures. Consider David’s reflection on his failure:

3 For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. 4 Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight; so you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge. (Psalm 51:3-4, NIV).

David clearly accepted responsibility for his sin. While not every failure we experience is a moral failure like his, we can learn from his experience what it means to accept responsibility for where we failed.

Accepting responsibility for failure requires awareness.

David said, “I know my transgressions….” He named the failure as his own. He didn’t make excuses or blame others. Naming failure takes humility and courage. David moved beyond worrying about what others would think. He didn’t allow his position to keep him from confession. He was aware of his failure and honest enough to own it.

Some leaders look for excuses and scapegoats when they fail. They blame others, their past, or forces beyond their control. But serving leaders take an honest look at their failure and name it as their own.

Accepting responsibility for failure acknowledges impact.

David said to God, “Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight…” This was after the prophet Nathan made it very clear to David that his sin was against Uriah and against Bathsheba (see 2 Samuel 12:7-9). Uriah died, Bathsheba lost a husband and their child would also die. David acknowledged his responsibility for bloodshed (see Psalm 51:14). Yet he recognized that ultimately his failure was a sin against a holy God. He acknowledged the full depth of the impact of his failure.

Some leaders focus on the impact of their failure in terms of tangible losses—finances, outputs or delays in accomplishing the mission. But serving leaders acknowledge the full impact of their failure on relationships, morale, trust and other intangibles. They take responsibility for their part in the failure and acknowledge its full impact.

Accepting responsibility for failure embraces consequences.

David embraced the consequences of his failure. He tells God, “…you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge.” He would lose the life of his young son as a result of his sin, and while he pleaded with God to spare him that loss, he accepted the outcome without accusing God of injustice (see 2 Samuel 12:14-23).

Some leaders take responsibility for their failure but resist accepting the consequences of their mistake. They expect that acknowledging the failure will release them from the consequences. But serving leaders humbly accept that failure has consequences. They are willing to have difficult conversations, make things right or take time to rebuild trust.

For further reflection and discussion:

• Reflect on a significant failure in your life and answer the following questions about it: Did I fully acknowledge my responsibility and the impact of that mistake in both tangible and intangible ways? Were there ways that I blamed others or resisted accepting the consequences? How did my response impact my leadership?
• What is the balance between accepting my own responsibility for failure and not beating myself up over it? Which direction do I most naturally lean? What do I need to change?
• Read again the account of David’s failure in 2 Samuel 11-12 (especially 12:11-23), and his psalm of repentance, Psalm 51. What additional insights do you learn about failure from this story?

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll examine how to investigate your failures.

All leaders fail, but not all leaders find ways to make failure fruitful. The fear of failure often keeps leaders from moving forward and the pain of failure keeps them from trying again. Effective leaders turn failures into opportunities to grow by changing their perception of and response to failure.

This series will look at failure through the lens of one of the most public failures of the Bible, David’s sin with Bathsheba, a failure that is still talked about thousands of years later! This well-known story is found in 2 Samuel 11-12 where we learn that David committed adultery with Uriah’s wife, Bathsheba, and then plotted Uriah’s death. We’ll focus not so much on the details of his failure but on Psalm 51, which is his cry for forgiveness and his reflection on his failure. We’ll use the word “FAILS” to learn five principles that helped David respond to his failure in ways that brought fruit from his failure. The first is to Find a new definition of failure. David acknowledged his sinfulness but refused to let that define him.

3 For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me.

5 Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. 6 Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place. 7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. 13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways, so that sinners will turn back to you (Psalm 51:3, 5-7, 12-13, NIV).

How did David define his failure and what can we learn from him?

Failure is an event, not an identity.

David clearly acknowledged that he had failed. “I know my transgressions…” At the same time, he cried out to God for cleansing in expectation that his sin could be forgiven and his joy restored. He saw his failure as an event, as something which had happened. But the failure was not his identity. His posture was essentially “I failed, but I’m not a failure.”

Some leaders allow failure to define them. They see themselves as failures and dwell on how badly they have done wrong. But serving leaders see failure as an event, not an identity. They can say with David, “Yes, I failed, but I’m not a failure.”

Failure is an opportunity for a new beginning.

David was in the depths of grief and sorrow as he reflected on his sin. Yet, he was able to see a glimpse of the future and declared that after his restoration, “I will teach transgressors your ways, so that sinners will turn back to you.” He refused to see his failure as the end of the road for his influence. By faith, he could see how God would allow him to use his failure to help others.

Some leaders acknowledge their sin and assume that it’s the end of their ability to influence. But serving leaders believe that God will even use their failures to advance His purposes through their lives.

Failure is a universal human experience.

David does not minimize or excuse his sin, but he recognizes that human failure is a universal experience. He sees that he is not the only sinner in the world; there are other “transgressors” who have also failed as he has. He would not allow his failure to distance him from others but would use it to strengthen his connection with others who have also failed.

Some leaders allow their failures to isolate them from others. But serving leaders use their failures to associate more deeply with others.

For further reflection and discussion:

How do I normally see my failures, as an event or an identity? How has this impacted my response to failure?

Are there times that I have failed and allowed that failure to keep me from dreaming of ways that God could use me in the future? What has been the impact of this view on my life and leadership? What would change if I saw the same failure as an opportunity for a new beginning?

When I fail, do I allow the failure to isolate me from others, or do I use it to associate more with others? What difference does this make in my leadership? How do I move towards using my failures to bring me closer to others?

Read again the account of David’s failure in 2 Samuel 11-12, and his psalm of repentance, Psalm 51. What additional insights do you learn about failure from this story?

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll look at how to accept responsibility for your failures.

Healthy leaders pay attention to their heart, the seat of their emotions. In the previous issue we recognized the power of our heart to direct our lives and the difficulty in understanding it. David acknowledged his desire to have an undivided heart. He also cried out to God for help in understanding the condition of his heart.

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts (Psalm 139:23).

David’s cry to God to search, know and test his heart was his attempt to gauge the condition of his heart. His cry gives serving leaders insight into how we can begin to understand the condition of our hearts.

The condition of our heart is gauged with vulnerability.   

David’s posture is one of extreme vulnerability. He cries out to God to take a close look into the depths of his own heart and soul, to “search” and “know” and “test” his heart—a risky step but vital step towards understanding his heart.  Already in the first verses of this Psalm, David has already acknowledged that God knows his thoughts and words even before they are expressed. (See Ps. 139:1-6). So, now he is secure enough to invite God to help him understand his own heart. For leaders, vulnerability is not weakness—it is a strength that brings greater self-awareness and cultivates trust with those who follow.

 Some leaders choose to lead without vulnerability. They focus on getting the work done and consider any discussion of emotions as conversation for weak leaders.  But serving leaders recognize that their emotions impact their leadership and the condition of their heart is of primary importance. So, they are willing to be vulnerable with themselves, with God and others. 

The condition of our heart is gauged by searching. 

David’s primary request of God is “Search me…” This implies sustained, intentional attention to his heart. He welcomes God into this space to help him understand the condition of his heart. 

Some leaders prefer not to search their hearts and have no desire to know what is happening deep in their heart.  But serving leaders intentionally search for understanding of their internal world, their heart. They acknowledge that they cannot see their own blind spots and ask God and others for help.

The condition of our heart is gauged by acknowledging emotions.

David asks God to examine his “anxious thoughts.” He acknowledges that he has the emotion of anxiety and invites God to help him find out what it says about his heart. Identifying and acknowledging emotions is not an easy task for leaders. Leaders often notice only a few surface emotions but struggle to identify deeper feelings below the surface. In a meeting they may recognize frustration but not be aware of the anxiety driving it. This has been an area of continued growth for me! I have worked hard in this area and still have much to learn!  I have been helped by using a “feelings wheel”(*) to identify and acknowledge what I am feeling. 

Some leaders prefer not to take the risk of acknowledging their emotions. They may recognize an occasional outburst of emotion when it is evident to all but certainly have no interest in digging deeper to see what is under the surface. But serving leaders want to know and understand what is happening in their hearts. They pause often to reflect on what they are feeling, not simply what they are thinking.

For further reflection and discussion:

On a scale of 1 to 10, how aware am I of my own emotions? How does this impact my leadership?

How often am I vulnerable enough to ask God, or someone close to me, to help me understand what is happening in my emotions? Do I need the help of a counselor or professional to help me in this area?

What causes me anxiety as a leader? Do I notice what issues are on my mind when I wake up in the morning—signs of my subconscious emotions? 

Are there lies I have allowed myself to believe about my emotions? If so, how can I align my thoughts with truth? (For example, many leaders see some emotions as “good” and some as “bad.” Since we want to be good, it is difficult to acknowledge an emotion we have labeled as “bad.” There might be many other falsehoods we have accepted about emotions that are not aligned with scripture.)

What is the difference between healthy awareness of emotion and being emotional as a leader? (Reflect on what it means to be aware of emotion that informs our leadership vs. allowing feelings to determine our words and actions.) Which side do you tend to lead from?

In addition to the verses mentioned in this issue, read and reflect on the following verses about the heart: Psalm 13:2, 73:21-22; Proverbs 21:2, 29:11; Jeremiah 17:9-10; Matthew 26:37-38; Mark 3:5; Luke 19:41-44; John 11:33-35; and Philippians 4:7    How do these verses deepen my understanding about the condition of my heart?      

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll examine how to guard the direction of our heart.

*Many versions of “feelings wheel” can be found online, a sample is here.

Note: Some of the thoughts for this series were inspired by the book, The Wholehearted Leader, by Simon and Ceri Harris.  The book focuses primarily on the emotions of the heart and their impact on leadership. While the biblical view of the heart is broader than emotions, it certainly includes emotions, which is often overlooked in leadership. The book offers great insight on how leaders can lead with healthy hearts.

Most leadership writing is action focused, which is natural since leaders value results. Yet, the Bible focuses more on matters of the heart, mentioning our heart more than 500 times, certainly an indication of how significant our heart is. While the biblical view of the heart encompasses the mind, will and emotions, in this series we will focus primarily on the element of emotions, our feelings, and how our heart impacts our leadership. The verses below help us understand the significance of the heart and why it is worth our careful attention. 

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Proverbs 4:23, NIV).

“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” (Jeremiah 17:9).

“Teach me your way, Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name” (Ps. 86:11).

 These verses help us grasp the significance of our hearts.

Our heart is directive.   

The writer of Proverbs says clearly that everything we do flows from our heart. Our heart determines our direction and influences our actions. Our heart directs what we say and do. Often, our actions are guided by emotions hidden deep in our heart. This is why when Samuel was choosing a king God told him “People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7b). God was looking much deeper than what showed on the outside; He looked into the heart.

Some leaders seek to change their behavior and do what is right without examining their hearts. But serving leaders seek to understand the feelings in their hearts that are shaping their behavior.

Our heart is difficult.   

Jeremiah asks, “Who can understand the heart?” It is “deceitful” and therefore difficult to understand. We will not easily know what is happening in our hearts. Our emotions, motives, and intentions are often hidden even from our own awareness. It is not easy for leaders to acknowledge the difficulty of knowing their own heart. Followers expect action and results and leaders tend to focus on the externals rather than doing the hard work of examining their own heart. Even those who attempt to understand their hearts encounter the truth of Jeremiah and recognize that their own heart can deceive them.

Some leaders arrogantly assume that they know themselves quite well and don’t question their own hearts. But serving leaders embrace the challenge of understanding their own hearts.  

Our heart is divided.

David, the leader known as “the man after God’s own heart”, cries out to God for an “undivided” heart! He is acknowledging the reality that despite our best intentions and our honest internal work, our hearts remain divided. We have mixed motives. There is a disconnect between what we think and what we feel and we are often unaware of the feelings that lie below our actions.

Some leaders ignore the warning signs of a divided heart. They plunge ahead with more good actions and seek to improve their behavior with no regard for the emotions in their hearts.  But serving leaders recognize the reality of a divided heart and cry out to God for an undivided heart before acting.

For further reflection and discussion:

• In my own leadership how aware am I of how significant my heart/emotions are? In what way does my awareness, or lack of awareness, impact my leadership?
• What is a recent leadership action that I knew was not the best? What emotion was in my heart that led to that behavior? Was there a need that I had underneath that emotion? Did I seek to identify the feeling that led to the behavior or simply to change the behavior?
• How fully have I accepted the reality that my heart is deceitful? What impact does this have on how I lead?
• In what ways is my own heart divided? (Reflect on a recent leadership decision. What were my thoughts and what were my feelings? Was there alignment between my feelings and thoughts or were they divided? Did feelings or thoughts most shape my action?)  
• In addition to the verses mentioned in this issue, read and reflect on the following verses about the heart: Proverbs 23:7, 27:19; Jeremiah 17:10; Matthew 15:18-19; and Luke 6:45. How do these verses deepen my understanding about the value of the heart?    

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll look at how to gauge the condition of our heart.

Note: Some of the thoughts for this series were inspired by the book, The Wholehearted Leader, by Simon and Ceri Harris.  The book focuses primarily on the emotions of the heart and their impact on leadership. While the biblical view of the heart is broader than emotions, it certainly includes emotions, which is often overlooked in leadership. The book offers great insight on how leaders can lead with healthy hearts.

Serving leaders, like all leaders, have and use authority.  Authority is the legitimate power that gives them the right to act in their role as a leader. But many serving leaders may find the subject of authority a bit awkward.  Is authority good or bad? How does it fit with the concept of serving others? In this series we’ll examine how serving leaders view and use authority. First, a glimpse at the life of David reveals that serving leaders respect the authority of those above them. David was anointed to be king, but Saul was still on the throne and was chasing David and his men. Twice, David had an easy opportunity to kill Saul and take the kingdom. On one of these occasions, David cut off the corner of Saul’s robe.  

 ⁵Afterward, David was conscience-stricken for having cut off a corner of his robe. ⁶He said to his men, “The Lord forbid that I should do such a thing to my master, the Lord’s anointed, or lay my hand on him; for he is the anointed of the Lord.” ⁷With these words David sharply rebuked his men and did not allow them to attack Saul. And Saul left the cave and went his way (1 Samuel 24: 5-7, NIV).

David’s restraint shows remarkable respect for the authority of Saul even when Saul was seeking to kill him. David acknowledged that Saul was the king and respected his position even when he didn’t agree with the actions of the king. David’s response shows serving leaders the results of respect for those in authority over them.

Respect for authority builds character.  

This period was a very difficult time in David’s life as he was chased by king Saul. It was a time that his character was tested and shaped in powerful ways. Most significantly, David learned that before he should be in authority, he had to learn to be under authority. This is always a difficult lesson for leaders and much more difficult when the person in authority is not a good leader! But serving leaders respect the authority of those over them and allow God to shape their character as they show respect by their words and actions.  

Respect for authority builds trust

David acted with respect for authority because it was the right thing to do. But his followers were also watching. As they saw David’s respect for king Saul they grew in their trust of David. They observed that he was “conscience-stricken” after cutting Saul’s robe. They heard him describe his enemy as “the anointed of the Lord.” As they watched him closely, they recognized that David was a leader they could trust. Serving leaders build trust with those who follow as they respect the authority of those over them.

Respect for authority builds people.

David’s actions challenged and shaped those who followed him. Although they initially disagreed with his position David’s respect for king Saul helped them grow. David helped them grow them by rebuking them when their values did not align with his. As these men witnessed David’s loyalty to Saul, they also became extremely loyal to David. These men would go on to do extraordinary exploits for David.  They knew that because David had respect for authority, he would not misuse authority when he was in power. Serving leaders serve those who follow by respecting the authority of those above them. As they do so they build the people around them.   

For further reflection and discussion:

• What is my attitude towards those in authority over me? Am I able to respect them even when I don’t agree with their decisions? How does my attitude impact the way I lead?   
• How do I talk about those in authority over me? What impact does this have on my leadership as those who follow listen to my comments?
• How do I want those under my authority to view my leadership? Do I have this same view of those over me? How does this impact my ability to serve those under me?      

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll look at how serving leaders accept authority.

¹Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him. ²Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. ³How long will you assault me? Would all of you throw me down— this leaning wall, this tottering fence? ⁴Surely they intend to topple me from my lofty place; they take delight in lies. With their mouths they bless, but in their hearts they curse. ⁵Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. ⁶Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. ⁷My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. ⁸Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge (Psalm 62:1-8).

David writes these words from a place of peaceful rest. He mentions rest several times as well as calls God his “rock”, “fortress”, and “refuge.” What does he teach us about peace?

Peace should be recognized. David says, “Truly my soul finds rest in God.” He is at a place of peaceful rest. Peace is an emotion we can easily overlook because it does not have the intensity of many other emotions. We are more likely to recognize when we feel anxious or angry. There are no loud bells or whistles to alert us to this emotion, just a quiet sense that our soul is at rest. When we are experiencing peace, it may feel so comfortable that we don’t recognize it!

We may believe that the emotion of peace can be experienced only when all is well. But David makes it clear that he is experiencing peace during an assault from his enemies! David helps servant leaders learn to recognize that peace is possible even during difficult times.

Peace should be revealed. David reveals that he is at a place of peace and rest. He reveals this emotion to himself and to others. He speaks about the state of his soul as he says, “my soul finds rest in God.” He also speaks to his soul, “Yes, my soul, find rest in God…” He invites servant leaders to not only reveal emotion but to direct their emotion in the proper direction. Finally, he invites others to join him in this emotion, “Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.” His call is an invitation to all servant leaders who lack peace. David invites us to focus on God as a refuge for whatever storm we may be encountering.

When peace is missing, it may indicate that we are focused on the storm swirling around us instead of the “rock” who provides peace in the storm. Servant leaders learn to reveal peace and know what to do when they find it missing.

Peace should be restrained. Many of the emotions we have looked at need wise restraint to minimize any negative impact. But peace is generally a very positive emotion. It seems that we should desire more peace, not less! Yes, peace is a great emotion and most leaders should seek more of it. But there are also ways it can hinder our leadership.

A leader may enjoy a sense of peace so much that he/she is not willing to make difficult decisions and move forward courageously. Leaders cannot be satisfied with the way things are; they desire to bring change. They should do this with a peaceful spirit, but with many other emotions involved to overcome the friction of movement. There may also be times when peace is the wrong emotion. In the face of injustice, anger may be a more appropriate emotion than peace! So, servant leaders learn, as with other emotions, that peace at times should be restrained.

May you experience peace, as well as the full range of other emotions that God created us to feel. And may your leadership reflect appropriate expressions of them all! Use the ‘feelings wheel’ below to remind you that feelings are an important part of our journey.

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

For further reflection and discussion:

• Would others describe me as a peaceful person?
• Have I learned to “speak” to my soul as David did? If not, stop and practice! Reflect on what emotions you feel in your soul, then speak words of correction to yourself.
• Do I tend to experience too little or too much peace? What does David teach me about how to correct that?
• At the end of this series on emotions, take some time to reflect with the following questions:
  • How have I grown in my awareness of how I am feeling?
  • How have I changed in my willingness to let others know my emotions?
  • How have these changes impacted my leadership?              

In the next issue, we’ll begin a series on speaking the truth in love!  

Copyright, Global Disciples 2019

Every leader has moments when the natural response is to take revenge and see someone else suffer. David certainly had these times in his life as he experienced opposition from many different places. Psalm 109 records one of these situations.  

¹My God, whom I praise, do not remain silent, ²for people who are wicked and deceitful have opened their mouths against me; they have spoken against me with lying tongues. ³With words of hatred they surround me; they attack me without cause. ⁴In return for my friendship they accuse me, but I am a man of prayer. ⁵They repay me evil for good, and hatred for my friendship. ⁶Appoint someone evil to oppose my enemy; let an accuser stand at his right hand.  When he is tried, let him be found guilty, and may his prayers condemn him. ⁸May his days be few; may another take his place of leadership. ⁹May his children be fatherless and his wife a widow. ¹⁰May his children be wandering beggars; may they be driven from their ruined homes. ¹¹May a creditor seize all he has; may strangers plunder the fruits of his labor…. ²⁷Let them know that it is your hand, that you, LORD, have done it. ²⁸While they curse, may you bless; may those who attack me be put to shame, but may your servant rejoice. ²⁹May my accusers be clothed with disgrace and wrapped in shame as in a cloak. ³⁰With my mouth I will greatly extol the LORD; in the great throng of worshippers I will praise him. ³¹For he stands at the right hand of the needy, to save their lives from those who would condemn them (Psalm 109:1-11; 27-31).

Vengeance should be recognized. David recognizes what he is feeling. He wants revenge! He wants those who oppose him to suffer! Vengeance is a strong emotion that stirs up intense feelings.

Many leaders would prefer not to acknowledge these kinds of feelings since they seem so wrong. But servant leaders learn to recognize vengeance. They acknowledge that it is better to recognize vengeance than to pretend it does not exist.

Vengeance should be revealed. David recognizes his emotion and writes it down for all of us to see! (There is more revealed if you take time to read the entire chapter!) Although David is a “leader after God’s own heart,” he is secure enough to be honest with what he feels and to share this with everyone.

Many Christian leaders find this emotion difficult to reveal since it seems so negative and so unlike Christ. What will others think about me if I reveal what I am feeling? Yet, until vengeance is revealed it cannot be redeemed. Servant leaders learn to reveal vengeance knowing that as they do, God will be able to direct them to deal with it in an appropriate way.

Vengeance should be restrained. While David revealed his desire for vengeance on his enemies, he fortunately did not act on his feelings! Instead, he goes to worship with others. As he worships, David understands that it is God who will “save their lives from those who would condemn them.”

Servant leaders learn to restrain their vengeance. They don’t allow their leadership position to become a place to attack their enemies. They learn to join with others in worship and turn their desire for revenge over to God. He is the only one that can save us from those who condemn us as He also saves us from the poison of revenge in our own hearts.

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

For further reflection and discussion:

• When is the last time I was hurt and really wanted revenge? What situation produced this emotion? Did I acknowledge and reveal my emotion or pretend it wasn’t there? Did I take it to God and ask Him to deliver me from the poison of revenge in my own heart?
• Reflect on Romans 12:17-21. What does it mean to “leave room for God’s wrath”? How can God change my heart so that I am able to bless my enemy? 
• Is it possible for our desire for vengeance to be in line with God’s judgement of wickedness? How do we know when our hearts and His are aligned?       

Every leader deals with questions like these about the future. These questions can easily lead to anxiety—a feeling of worry or nervousness about an imagined threat or future event.* In this issue, we’ll examine how David experienced the emotion of anxiety and what we can learn as servant leaders from his life.

¹⁶Who will rise up for me against the wicked? Who will take a stand for me against evildoers? ¹⁷Unless the LORD had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. ¹⁸When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, LORD, supported me. ¹⁹When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy. ²⁰Can a corrupt throne be allied with you—a throne that brings on misery by its decrees? ²¹The wicked band together against the righteous and condemn the innocent to death. ²²But the LORD has become my fortress, and my God the rock in whom I take refuge. ²³He will repay them for their sins and destroy them for their wickedness; the LORD our God will destroy them. (Psalm 94:16-23)

Anxiety should be recognized. David has many questions as he wrestles with God in this psalm. He questions whether there will be justice for those who oppose him. These questions troubled him to the extent that he felt that his “foot is slipping,” and could lead him to the “silence of death.” In the middle of his questions he recognizes that he has anxiety in his heart.

Anxiety is usually seen as a negative emotion, so it is more difficult for leaders to acknowledge. David might have paused to ask himself, “What am I feeling?” At least he recognized his emotion of anxiety.

Many leaders don’t stop to recognize what they are feeling and may not even be aware of the anxiety in their souls. But servant leaders learn to recognize anxiety and be honest about what they are feeling.

Anxiety should be revealed. David recognizes his anxiety and brings it to the surface. Because anxiety is not a healthy or positive emotion, many leaders try to ignore it, to pretend that it’s not there or to call it by another name! But David is honest enough to admit that he has a “great” amount of anxiety!

We can learn from David that anxiety thrives in secrecy but can be dealt with when it is revealed. Servant leaders learn to reveal their anxiety. They find a trusted friend or counselor with whom they can be completely honest. They are not afraid to say, “I’m filled with anxiety about….” Sometimes the honest confession is enough to break the grip of anxiety in the life of the leader.

Anxiety should be restrained. All leaders look towards the future and can be immobilized by anxiety and unanswered questions. But David’s response to his anxiety shows us that this emotion does not need to control our leadership. As he revealed his anxiety, he quickly came to a place of hope. God’s “consolation” brought him joy to replace the anxiety. In the final verses of this chapter, he acknowledges that God is his “fortress” and the One who will take care of his future.

David teaches us to focus on the One who controls the future, instead of the lies our enemy wants us to believe. Servant leaders learn to restrain their anxiety as they trust God for their future and then lead others with courage.

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

For further reflection and discussion:

• What situations in my own life bring me the greatest temptation to be anxious? 
• How aware am I that I feel anxious? Am I able to quickly recognize this emotion?
• Are there fears that keep me from revealing to others that I am anxious about the future? What does this say about what is happening in my soul?
• What is at the root of my anxiety? What lies am I believing about myself, this situation, or about God?
• In what way does my anxiety represent a lack of trust in God?
• Reflect on 1 Peter 5:7. What does this verse teach me about my anxiety?

*We have already examined how David responded to fear which relates to a known danger or event. Anxiety differs from fear as it focuses on a future imagined event.

Copyright, Global Disciples 2018. 

Can a great leader be confused? Leaders usually act with confidence and seem to know the direction to go. But all of us have faced situations in which the way forward was not very clear. David was a great leader, but experienced confusion and often cried out to God for direction and guidance.

4Show me your ways, LORD, teach me your paths. 5Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. 6Remember, LORD, your great mercy and love, for they are from of old. 7Do not remember the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you, LORD, are good…. 15My eyes are ever on the LORD, for only he will release my feet from the snare. 16Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. 17Relieve the troubles of my heart and free me from my anguish. 18Look on my affliction and my distress and take away all my sins. 19See how numerous are my enemies and how fiercely they hate me! 20Guard my life and rescue me; do not let me be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. 21May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope, LORD, is in you. 22Deliver Israel, O God, from all their troubles! (Psalm 25:4-7; 15-22)

We don’t know for certain the situation David was in when he wrote this psalm. He refers to the sins of his youth, so this must have been written later in his leadership, perhaps as he was fleeing from his son Absalom. Whatever the situation, his many requests for God to teach and guide him indicate that he was in a place of confusion and uncertainty.

Confusion should be recognized.

David cries out to God, “Show me your ways….Guide me in your truth….” David is admitting that he is confused and doesn’t know the right direction. He refers to the sins of his youth, perhaps recalling his sin with Bathsheba (see 2 Samuel 11). These memories from his past may have been a source of his confusion so he cries out again for God’s mercy and love as he recognizes his confusion.

Many leaders find it very difficult to admit that they are confused. Their identity may be tied to their ability to give answers and to show others the way forward. So, it is painful to acknowledge, even to themselves, that they are unsure of the right direction. Servant leaders learn to recognize confusion and to acknowledge that all humans experience confusion!

Confusion should be revealed.

David is open to everyone about his need for direction, revealing it even to us who read it centuries later! Many leaders feel that it is a sign of weakness to reveal confusion or uncertainty. So they may choose to hide it or pretend that it is not there, at least until the way forward is clear. This does not mean that we should stand and announce to everyone, “I am confused!”

But servant leaders seek wise counsel from God and others when they are confused. They look for friends who can hear their confusion and provide direction or help. Servant leaders don’t panic when they are confused; they recognize it and reveal it. They realize that this emotion is a part of being human and therefore limited in knowledge and wisdom. They cry out to God for guidance, share their confusion with trusted friends, and expect that in time, the way forward will become clear.

Confusion should be restrained.

Confusion makes it difficult to lead! The uncertainty can lead to inaction. At the end of this psalm, David turns his attention away from his own emotion back to the nation he is leading. He says, “Deliver Israel, O God, from all their troubles!”

Servant leaders learn to restrain their confusion so that it doesn’t keep them from moving forward with the people God has given them to lead. They recognize the emotion and keep leading!

For further reflection and discussion:

Identify a situation from your past in which you were confused as a leader. Reflect on that experience by answering the following questions.

• How did I process that emotion?
• Did I recognize my confusion at the time?
• Was I able to reveal it to others appropriately or did I hide it from others?
• Was my confusion a result of previous sins in any way? If so, have I confessed and repented of those sins?
• Was I able to continue leading when I was confused?
• What would I do differently after learning from David’s story?

¹ Listen to my prayer, O God, do not ignore my plea; ² hear me and answer me. My thoughts trouble me and I am distraught ³ because of what my enemy is saying, because of the threats of the wicked; for they bring down suffering on me and assail me in their anger. ⁴ My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death have fallen on me. ⁵ Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me… ²² Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken. ²³ But you, God, will bring down the wicked into the pit of decay; the bloodthirsty and deceitful will not live out half their days. But as for me, I trust in you (Psalm 55:1-5, 22-23).

David faced his fear and learned to overcome this powerful emotion and he guides servant leaders on their own journeys with fear.

Fear should be recognized. David recognizes his emotion. “Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me.” David’s enemies are speaking against him and making threats. The natural response is to be afraid and David recognizes this fear which was overwhelming to him.

Leaders often believe the lie that strong people should not experience fear. So, they find it very difficult to identify the emotion of fear and may call it anger, worry or something else. But servant leaders learn to recognize fear and are not ashamed to admit, “I am afraid.” They know that they won’t correctly respond to fear until they can name it.

Fear should be revealed. As David recognizes his fear he reveals it to God. ^“As for me, I call to God, and the LORD saves me. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice.” David revealed his fear to God three times a day!

When servant leaders recognize their fear and reveal it, they can begin to process it more thoughtfully as David did. They can examine the fear to determine if it is a rational fear that will keep them from danger or they may find that it is an irrational fear that is crippling and harmful based on false or incomplete information.

Servant leaders learn to reveal fear, but they are careful to reveal it to the right persons. Certainly, as David did, it is appropriate to reveal the fear to God, not because He is unaware, but because we need to acknowledge it! But it is often helpful as well to reveal our fear to someone else. Servant leaders look for others who will help them deal correctly with their fear. They avoid revealing it to those who will only increase the fear.

Fear should be restrained. David shows leaders that fear does not need to control our leadership. He concludes this Psalm with hope. “Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you… But as for me, I trust in you.” David learns to bring his fears to God and to learn to trust instead of fear.

Fear can cripple a leader and make it difficult to move forward. The fear may be real when a serious threat is experienced. Or it may be an imagined fear of what others will think that keeps a leader from making a difficult decision. David teaches servant leaders that the solution to fear is trust! He chooses to focus on God during his fear and this frees him to trust in God. David realizes that God may not literally remove all the things he fears, but God will not let him be shaken.

Servant leaders learn to restrain their fear. They say to themselves and those they lead, “Our fear is with us, but our God is bigger than our fears.” Servant leaders turn fear into trust and lead on!

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

For further reflection and discussion:

• What do I fear most often? Is my fear a rational fear to keep me safe or is it irrational? If irrational, what is the reality?
• When I am afraid, am I able to reveal this appropriately to others or do I try to hide it? Who is or could be a helpful person to whom I can reveal my fear?
• How significantly is my leadership shaped by fear? Am I able to openly admit my fear as David did? Do I regularly choose to turn my fear into trust? How do I communicate this to others?

Copyright, Global Disciples 2018.