How does Christmas impact your leadership? The coming of Jesus as a baby changes everything and reshapes the way we lead. Theologians describe the coming of Jesus as the incarnation which means that God stepped into human life. He entered our world, our struggles and our experiences. Matthew describes what would happen like this:

²¹ She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”

²² All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: ²³ “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel” (which means “God with us”) (Matthew 1:21-23, NIV).

The names given to Mary’s child were significant: Jesus and Immanuel. Jesus means savior and Immanual means “God with us.” At Christmas, God entered our world through Jesus. As He did, He demonstrated what incarnational leadership looks like.

Incarnational leadership enters the world of others.

“God with us.” The astounding reality of the Christmas story is that God left the majestic beauty and glory of heaven to enter our broken world through Jesus. What does this mean for our leadership? Leaders have the choice to live in their own world or to enter into the world of those they serve. Many leaders remain aloof and distant, far above those around them. But serving leaders make a conscious choice to practice incarnational leadership—listening, asking questions, and letting go of status barriers. They seek to understand the world that their followers are living in.  They enter the world of others.

Incarnational leadership walks with others.  

Jesus came to be “God with us.”  He would spend much of His life walking dusty roads with His disciples and many others. He provided the gift of His presence and companionship on the journey of life. It was not always easy or convenient, but He walked with others. Many leaders are too busy being great to have time for others. They are focused on their own journey. But serving leaders take time to walk with others. They leave the office and walk down the hall for a conversation. They come off the stage to mingle with the audience. They take a new employee or new member out for lunch to get to know them.  They walk with others.

Incarnational leadership meets the needs of others. 

The child born at Christmas was named Jesus “because he will save his people from their sins.” Jesus came to meet the greatest need humans have—salvation. Only Jesus saves, but we can reflect His heart by seeing the needs of others, caring about them and responding appropriately.

Many leaders are in positions of authority to have their own needs met. They focus on the goals of the organization and see others as means to accomplish that end. But serving leaders see others as people with genuine needs and concerns. They seek to address those needs. Where there is a need for an encouraging word, they provide it. Where there is a need for correction, they offer it. Where there is a financial need they seek to meet it. They meet the needs of others.

This Christmas your presence may be the best present you can give your followers— incarnational leadership that is “with them.”

For further reflection and discussion:

• Where am I tempted to remain in my own leadership bubble?  What have I done this week to leave that world and enter the world in which those I lead live daily?
• Would my team say I am walking with them, or distant? What steps could I take this week to walk with one person on my team?
• Does your leadership focus primarily on meeting your own needs or of those you serve? What is one need you can meet today for someone on your team?
• What one incarnational act can I offer to someone this week?       

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

December 11, 2024

One of the profound mysteries of the Christian faith is that God came to be with us in the person of Jesus! One of the many names of Jesus is Emmanuel which means “God with us.” (See Mt. 1:23). Theologians call this the incarnation which means that in Jesus the divine spirit of God and human flesh were united. John calls Jesus the Word and summarizes it in this way:

“The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth (John 1:14, NIV).   

The incarnation, when God came to be with us, changes everything! And in the incarnation, Jesus models the way for serving leader to be with those they serve.

Incarnational leaders identify with those they serve.  

“The Word become flesh…” Jesus became one of us so that He could fully understand us. He was born as a helpless child and went through the normal process of growing up. He experienced pain, exhaustion, temptation, hunger, betrayal, etc. so that He would understand what those He served experienced in life. The writer of Hebrews says that Jesus is able to sympathize with our weaknesses because He was tempted as we are. (Hebrews 4:15)

Some leaders rise in power and authority and forget what it was like to be on the other side of leadership. They forget the growing process they went through and the many mistakes they made along the way. They fail to identify with those they serve. But serving leaders see themselves as human and recognize that those they serve are also humans. They call for growth, but they also sympathize with failures. Serving leaders identify with those they serve.  

Incarnational leaders relate with those they serve.   

“The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us.” Jesus came to live with us! A paraphrase (The Message) says that Jesus “moved into the neighborhood.” Jesus spent most of His time with the people He came to serve. He ate with them, walked with them, worked with them, laughed with them and cried with them. He built strong relationships with them.  Jesus laid aside His rights and privileges as the King of Kings and related with others in a natural winsome way. He came to be with them, not over them.

Some leaders seek to distance themselves from those they serve. They insist on special privileges and titles that distinguish themselves from followers. But serving leaders follow the example of Jesus. They lay down their rights and bridge the gap between leaders and followers. They do not seek to dominate or dictate but build genuine relationships with the ones they serve. Serving leaders relate with those they serve. 

Incarnational leaders share with those they serve.  

“We have seen his glory….full of grace and truth.” Jesus was incarnational and human but He was also a leader. He had a mission to accomplish and part of that was to reveal His plan to His disciples. He shared with them a different way to live and a different way to lead. He shared truth with them that was perfectly balanced with grace.  

Some leaders share plenty of truth but with very little grace! Others show so much grace they never get around to the truth. Serving leaders share both grace and truth.  

Some leaders start by sharing truth and see their only function as getting people to do what is expected and produce the desired results. But serving leaders follow the example of Jesus. They don’t share truth until they identify with and build relationships with those they serve. From that foundation, they share both truth and grace. Serving leaders share with those they serve. 

For further reflection and discussion:

• Take a moment to identify with one person that you lead. Imagine what life is like for them. What challenges are they facing at home, physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually? What difference will this make in the way you lead them?
• Reflect on the level of your relationship with those you lead, especially those at the lowest level in your organization. Do I enjoy being with them? When is the last time we have eaten together? Do we ever do things together that are not related to my role or because of being in the same organization?  
• Leadership is about being with those you serve. In what ways this season can you be with those you serve? Find ways to give more of your presence which is more precious than presents.     
• Have I shared truth with those I serve before I identified with them and build a relationship with them? What was the result in my leadership?
• Do I most often share more truth or more grace? How does that impact my leadership?
• Consider the following verses and reflect more on what it means to be an incarnational leader from the example of Jesus and instructions of scripture: John 4:6; 8:1-11; 11:35; Hebrews 4:15-16; 5:2; Ephesians 4:15; Philippians 2:1-11, Galatians 6:1-3.  In what way can I more closely reflect Jesus’ incarnational leadership?

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

This Christmas season believers all over the world reflect on the amazing story of God entering our world as baby. It is a story filled with angels, dreams, miracles, and awe. At the center of the story we find Joseph and Mary on a journey to Bethlehem, finding a stable in which to spend the night when Jesus was born. While there are so many facets to this story and so many leadership lessons, let’s look at Joseph’s role in this story. Amazingly, we don’t have any recorded words from this man. He served with silence! (Read his story in Matthew 1-2 and Luke 2.)  This is not to imply that he didn’t speak, only that nothing he said is recorded. His silence challenges all serving leaders to learn to serve with silence.

Serving with silence enhances listening.

Joseph’s silence encouraged him to listen and to listen well! When he was considering how to respond to his pregnant fiancé he listened as God spoke to him in a dream. (Matthew 1:18-21). It would have been much harder for him to hear God’s voice if he had loudly declared what he was intending to do. The plan was already in his mind, but had not come out of his mouth and he was able to listen and change his plans. He listened again when his dream instructed them to flee to Egypt to avoid the wrath of king Herod. He modeled well the words that James, possibly his son, would write later, “Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear” (James 1:19, MSG). Perhaps James learned this by observing his father.

Many leaders focus on what they say and spend more time speaking than listening. Josef teaches serving leaders that silence enhances listening. Serving leaders recognize that when they are speaking they are not listening.

Serving with silence elevates others.

On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him (Matthew 2:9-11a, NIV). Joseph was not even mentioned in the visit of the wise men! And in many other places Mary is named first and honored more. Joseph often acted as a strong leader. He took Mary to be his wife after hearing from the angel. He named Jesus and presented Him in the temple. He guided the family on international journeys. But he did it with few words, none recorded for us. His silence elevated others!

Many leaders elevate themselves by talking a lot. Serving leaders learn that when they are silent about themselves, others can shine. They are quick to give credit to others on their teams instead of drawing attention to themselves. They recognize that speaking often elevates the speaker while silence elevates others.

Serving with silence encourages humility.

After the story of Jesus in the temple at 12 years old, we don’t hear any further mention of Joseph. Mary is sometimes mentioned before Joseph and sometimes he is omitted completely. Joseph served with silence and did not protest about the lack of credit for his leadership. This silence reflects his humility. His ability to listen and elevate others shows the humble heart of a serving leader.

Many leaders speak and make sure that everyone around knows what they have accomplished and the impact they have made in the world. But serving leaders quietly and often silently lead with humility. Silence encourages humility by keeping leaders in a less visible place.

The silence of Joseph is a timely example to all serving leaders. His example certainly does not imply that we should not speak. But he challenges us to serve more by speaking less.  

For further reflection and discussion:

• How often do I lead with silence? What does the life of Joseph call me to practice in my leadership?
• Am I quicker to speak or to listen? How does that impact my leadership? What can I do to strengthen my ability to listen well?
• Are there ways recently that I have elevated myself by speaking? What can I do to elevate others more consistently?
• What does the amount of speaking I do reflect about my heart? Does it reflect pride or humility?                     

Merry Christmas to each of you! It’s a privilege to write these reflections and I’m grateful that you read them. Give a gift to a friend by forwarding this to them and encouraging them to subscribe!

CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR YOU! Center for Serving Leadership has a special Christmas gift, a free offer on our Serving Leader Short Course, normally priced at $99, now FREE until Jan. 2, 2023. Click here to enroll.

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

In the next issue, we’ll begin a series on Paul’s leadership pipeline.

A scripture verse usually inspires my thoughts on leadership. But this Christmas it was a picture that captured my attention. We often hear the story of the biblical Kings who came to worship. On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold and of incense and of myrrh (Matthew 2:11). The painting I saw was a special painting of royalty from many nations, bowing down to worship the baby in the manger. From every nation, they bowed in worship and laid down their crowns to the child who was born King of Kings. The picture of these kings bowing down caused me to reflect on what it means for leaders to worship. Servant leaders bow down to worship. They “lay down” their crowns. What are the things servant leaders lay before the King?

Servant leaders lay down their roles.

We may be “kings” where we lead and can tell others what to do, share vision and make decisions. But when we see Jesus, we meet someone of a much higher rank. He is the one with the position far greater than any we might hold! Servant leaders respond by bowing down and surrendering.

This Christmas season, pause for a moment and look at Jesus. Prayerfully hold your position in your hand and lay it down at the feet of Jesus. Acknowledge that He is the King.

Servant leaders lay down their rights.

The kings were used to being served and having others meet their needs. As leaders, they surely expected others to give them respect and many privileges that accompanied royalty. But as they knelt before Jesus, they did not ask for anything or expect special treatment. They surrendered their rights. Servant leaders relinquish their rights to be respected, thanked, and appreciated.

This Christmas, pause for a moment as you look at Jesus. What rights do you hold in your hand? Prayerfully lay them down at the feet of Jesus. Surrender your rights as you kneel before Him.

Servant leaders lay down their resources.

The Kings brought gifts as they worshipped Jesus. They laid down their treasures. We may not know the actual value of the gifts they offered, but it was certainly not a cheap and easy offering. They gave their precious resources to Jesus. Even the months of time they took to travel was surrendered as a gift to Jesus. Servant leaders recognize that they are simply stewards of any resources they have. They recognize that all they possess actually belongs to Jesus and they are willing to lay it all down in worship.

This Christmas season, pause for a moment and look at Jesus. What resources do you hold in your hand? What will it mean for you to give them to Jesus? Prayerfully lay them down at the feet of Jesus.

Servant leaders bow and worship Jesus, not only at Christmas but always! And as they worship, they lead others to bow with them at the feet of the greatest servant leader the world has ever known.

I wish each of you fellow leaders a blessed and joyous Christmas! It’s a privilege for me to share my thoughts with you on a regular basis and I’m grateful for all you do to represent the King in your realm of leadership.

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

Here’s the link to the picture that inspired this reflection along with a newspaper article:

http://tinyurl.com/hbtfvam

After New Year’s we’ll continue looking at the series on timing, a time to encourage.

Copyright, Jon Byler 2016.

This Christmas we are looking at Mary and Joseph, both great servant leaders and together one of the most influential couples in history. In this issue we’ll turn our attention to Mary, the better known of the two and the one often mentioned first. In Luke 1:26-56 the story of her encounter with the angel and her visit to Elizabeth is recorded. Let’s observe what she did as a servant leader that gave her such great influence.

Mary humbled herself.

Perhaps the clearest example of Mary’s humility is her response to the angel’s announcement, “I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May it be to me as you have said.” Then the angel left her (Luke 1:38). After her questions, Mary’s response shows that she humbly surrendered to God’s direction for her life. Servant leaders recognize that before they are called to serve others they see themselves as the “Lord’s servant.” Then they humbly walk in obedience to His instruction.

Mary honored God.

Many people honor Mary but scripture makes it clear that she honored God above herself. “From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me– holy is his name” (Luke 1:48-49). Mary recognized that she would be remembered by “all generations,” which has indeed happened. Mary saw her destiny as great, but glorified God. Like Joseph, she is not looking for fame or monuments in her name; she turns all honor back to God. She continues with verse after verse praising God for what He has done. She, and all servant leaders who follow, turn the blessing of influence into opportunities to praise God. Servant leaders recognize that leadership is not about themselves; it is all for God’s glory.

Mary helped others.

Right after hearing from the angel Mary ran to see her relative Elizabeth. Both Mary and Elizabeth were chosen by God to fulfill a special part of the Christmas story and their experience of coming together still inspires all of us today. Certainly, for Mary, it was a precious gift to be with Elizabeth for the first months of her pregnancy. But Mary’s visit also helped Elizabeth to be a better person. “When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit” (Luke 1:41). Mary didn’t come to Elizabeth to build herself up or elevate her child over Elizabeth’s. Rather, being who she was and sharing her own journey of obedience to God’s call impacted the life of Elizabeth in a profound way. Mary’s song of praise to God shaped the life of Elizabeth and countless others who read it later. That’s what servant leaders do; they help others by lifting their spirits. Sometimes this is a deliberate process of using encouraging words, speaking affirmation and life into those we lead. At other times we help others simply by living our lives in humble obedience as Mary did. This inspires and helps others on their own journeys. Who around you this Christmas needs your help? Follow Mary’s lead and reach out to someone. Share your story or sing your song as you extend your hand to the person God will allow you to touch for His purposes.

Individually Joseph and Mary led as servants. But together, as a couple, they walked in humble obedience and influenced not only their own generation, but the entire world. A couple multiplies the impact! This Christmas season, the world can use a couple more servant leaders. If married, will you join together with your spouse to ask God to make you doubly influential as a couple for His glory in the coming year?

For further reflection and discussion:

• Read the entire account of Mary’s story in Luke 1:26-56. What do you observe from her life that can teach you as a leader? What was the secret of her lasting influence?
• Can your leadership be characterized as humble? Why or why not? What actions in the past week reflect your humility? Are there actions God is inviting you to make to humble yourself as a leader?
• In what way does God use your influence? What might be His purpose for your influence? How can you more effectively use your influence to honor God?
• Is your leadership primarily to help yourself achieve your goals or is it to help others? What action demonstrates this reality? Are there ways this season God wants to use your influence to help others?
• If married, in what ways does your relationship together multiply your influence? Are there changes you need to make to increase this influence? Talk about it and pray together, a great way to begin a new year!

As we enter the Christmas season let’s look at one of the most influential couples in history, Mary and Joseph. Both were great servant leaders and as a couple they were powerfully used of God to shape our world. In this issue, we’ll look at Joseph and how he led as a servant leader. (Read his story in Matthew 1-2 and Luke 2.)

Joseph connected with God.

It is clear that Joseph’s relationship with God was strong. On at least four different occasions in the Christmas story God spoke to Joseph through dreams. He listened well and obeyed quickly each circumstance. We know Joseph also obeyed God as he took Jesus to the temple soon after the birth and when Jesus was twelve years old. When Joseph and Mary had done everything required by the Law of the Lord, they returned to Galilee to their own town of Nazareth (Luke 2:39). Servant leadership flows out of union with Jesus. It is that relationship which makes servant leadership different from all other forms of leadership. Joseph reminds us to keep our relationship with God strong and active.

Joseph controlled himself.

The first indication of Joseph’s leadership is indicated with the words “Joseph her husband was a righteous man” (Matthew 1:19). Joseph’s character was his primary strength. Servant leadership starts on the inside and flows outward. Character matters! Joseph’s character is reflected in the way he controlled himself in two areas. First, Joseph controlled his tongue; he was a man of few words. In fact, we don’t have a single recorded word that Joseph spoke! This is not to imply that servant leaders should not speak, but it is a strong reminder that the number of our words does not necessarily increase our influence! His actions spoke louder than his words. A second evidence of the fruit of self-control in Joseph’s life is reflected in the biblical account, “When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son” (Matthew 1:24-25). Joseph was ready to be married and to enjoy the physical beauty of that relationship. But he controlled his passions and challenges each of us as servant leaders to look at our own lives to see if we are self-controlled. In our physical appetites, our sexual desires, the exercise of our bodies, our emotions, and the use of our tongue we are called to be self-controlled like Joseph.

Joseph cared about others.

When Joseph discovered that his fiancée was pregnant, I’m sure he was deeply hurt. But his response showed a deep care and compassion for Mary. Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly (Matthew 1:19). Joseph did not focus on his disappointment; he was concerned for Mary. Joseph’s focus was outward, not inward. He reminds us that servant leaders do not respond to pain by inflicting pain on others. Instead they absorb that pain and respond in love. Joseph also showed his care for others as he raised Jesus like his own son although he was not biologically the father. Servant leaders are called to shepherd with love those entrusted to them and they reach outside their own natural circles to embrace others with the love of God. That’s the story of Christmas!

Joseph soon faded into the background; we hear very little about him after the Christmas story. But he reminds us that servant leaders are not concerned about becoming famous, they simply walk with God in humble obedience and love others. This Christmas season, the world can use a couple more servant leaders like that. Will you be one?

For further reflection and discussion:

• Read all of Joseph’s story in Matthew 1-2 and Luke 2. What else do you learn from his example?
• Reflect on your relationship with Jesus. Do you listen well? Do you obey quickly? In what way does your leadership flow out of this relationship?
• Reflect on your tongue. To what extent is your tongue controlled? Do you speak too little or too much? Is your tongue building and encouraging others or discouraging them?
• Consider the following areas of your life and evaluate the extent to which each is appropriately under control: physical body, thought life, sexual appetite, use of time, temper/anger, emotions, and finances. Is God inviting you to make changes in any of these areas?
• In what ways has your leadership this week reflected love for others? Is there someone outside your natural circle of relationships that God is inviting you to show love to this Christmas season?

Greetings to each of you at the end of this year,

In this issue I simply want to convey to you my hope that you and those you serve will experience in a fresh way the impact of Christ’s birth during this Christmas season. The world’s greatest leader was God’s amazing gift to each one of us. His birth was seemingly insignificant; He was born in a manger, in poverty, and with no sign of royalty. Yet, his life has changed the course of history. He has changed my life and yours.

I’m impressed this year with the reality that “Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end” (Isaiah 9:7). His birth was the beginning, but His life continues to influence with increasing power. He has given each of us the privilege of playing a small role in this increase. He calls you and I to faithfully follow in His footsteps, growing in our own leadership capacity so that His name will be known throughout the earth. May it continue….until the earth is filled with the glory of the Lord, as the waters cover the sea (Habakkuk 2:14).

May God bless you as you serve in your family, your church, your business, and in your vocation. It’s a privilege to write to you on a regular basis and I am grateful for the feedback many of you offer. Your thoughts and suggestions for improvement are always welcome! We’ll continue looking at the life of David in the next issue.

Have a Blessed Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

Around the world Christians are again celebrating the birth of Jesus with special programs, giving of gifts and special foods. Leaders influence the focus of these celebrations and servant leaders can learn timeless truths by reflecting on the account of the visit of the Wise Men recorded by Matthew in chapter 2:1-12.

Servant Leaders Seek Jesus.

After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem and asked, "Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star in the east and have come to worship him.” (Matthew 2:1-2) The Wise Men exerted enormous effort simply to find Jesus. They left their homes and took a long journey following a star. They inquired from Herod and the religious leaders in Jerusalem about where they could find Him. In spite of the education, wealth, and wisdom they already possessed, they were searching for someone greater than themselves. On their journey they encountered a political leader who wasn’t willing to make the journey and religious leaders who were too indifferent to travel with them. In spite of these obstacles, they were willing to pay any price to find the true source of wisdom, life, and hope. Servant leaders, men and women, acknowledge that it takes more than leadership skills and college degrees to navigate the 21st century. They are willing to leave the crowds and find time to be alone, taking their own journey to seek Jesus. They are willing to risk embarrassment as they ask for guidance along the way from others who may be able to help them. Before leading others, they seek a personal encounter with the Master Leader valuing His presence more than anything else.

To think about: Where are you in your journey towards Jesus? Do you need to take some additional time this week to leave other things and focus on seeking Him?

Servant Leaders Surrender to Jesus.

Matthew records that the purpose of their visit was simply to worship. True worship involves surrender of our lives in the presence of a King, a voluntary yielding of control as we bend the knee. It is not easy for leaders to surrender. Leaders prefer to be in control, not surrender. Herod pretended to be interested in worship, the religious leaders did not even bother, but the Wise Men chose to surrender themselves to Jesus. The Wise Men did not come to ask a favor from Him. They were not asking Jesus to bless their leadership efforts, or solve their problems, they just came to worship. Servant leaders today do the same. They bow their knee and surrender everything in the presence of Jesus.

To think about: As a leader, have you purposefully surrendered to Jesus your leadership gifts, the people you lead, your own wisdom, talent, and abilities?

Servant Leaders Serve Jesus.

On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold and of incense and of myrrh. (Matthew 2:11) The Wise Men were eager to give gifts to Jesus, beginning a beautiful tradition of exchanging gifts as we celebrate Christmas. But this was not a gift exchange; this was simply an act of service to Jesus. They received nothing in return. But they gave Him their most prized possessions indicating their willingness to serve Him with their lives. Servant leaders are not in leadership because of what they will get out of it; rather, they lead to serve Jesus by serving those they lead.

To think about: What can you do as a leader to serve Jesus this Christmas season?

As we celebrate this Christmas season, let’s remember that wise men still seek Him.

Until next time, yours on the journey,

Jon Byler

For further reflection and discussion:

• Take a few moments to quietly read and reflect on Matthew’s account of the visit of the Wise Men. Write down what God speaks to you personally.
• How can I use my influence this year to encourage others to focus on Jesus, the real reason for the season?
• To what degree is my leadership characterized by seeking, surrendering to, and serving Jesus?

This will be the last edition of “Reflections for Servant Leaders” this year. I wish you, your families, and those that you lead a joyous Christmas and wonderful New Year!

Copyright, Jon Byler 2010.