Issue #4, April 9, 2009
We usually think of leadership as what we do with others outside our homes, in the church or in our work environment. But the list of leadership qualities Paul gives to Timothy says leaders “must be hospitable.” (Titus 1:8). Hospitality? It almost sounds like a foreign word! What does hosting people in our homes have to do with servant leadership?
Hospitality reveals a love for others.
Inviting someone to my home shows that I am focusing on that person instead of myself. I am thinking of them and expressing my love for them by considering something that will, hopefully, benefit them! When people visit, a good host focuses on their needs and graciously seeks to make them comfortable. Leading in public can often be about me and my agenda, but hospitality is about showing love to the guest. This focus on the needs of the other is an excellent way to develop people skills and learn to relate to a variety of personalities in a relaxed setting. Introverted personalities, like me, learn to keep a conversation going by asking good questions! Servant leaders love others.
Hospitality demonstrates a heart of giving.
Showing hospitality is all about giving, not receiving. Of course, I often receive blessings from visitors, but hospitality is costly! We may spend a bit more on food than normal to provide a nice meal. But it’s not only money that we give. We take time to make a meal and clean afterwards, make beds or wash extra clothes. We give up our routines to accommodate their schedules. Sometimes it costs sleep as we stay up late to talk. We may need to catch up later on things we needed to do. Hospitality requires giving and servant leaders give.
Hospitality exhibits vulnerability.
Inviting people into my home is an act of self disclosure. When people come to my home they see a very different part of my life from what they see when I teach or preach. At home they see me relaxed and watch how I relate to my children and my wife. They observe what we have hanging on our walls and what magazines are lying on the coffee table. If they stay overnight they find out what time I go to bed and what I eat for breakfast! Sitting around the table with a cup of tea provides a much different perspective than meeting in an office or a public event. Inviting visitors is risky. They might spill coffee on the carpet or break a prized item. Servant leaders are vulnerable.
Don’t just evaluate your leadership by what you do in public; serve others at home by offering hospitality. When is the last time you invited someone to your home? Do it…and grow as a servant leader.
Until next time, yours on the journey,
Jon
For further reflection and discussion:
- Am I eager to invite people to my home? Why or why not?
- Do others feel welcomed in my home?
- Is hospitality more difficult for people from cultures that value time over relationships?
- Is hospitality easier for some personalities than others? If so, what can be done to respond to the biblical challenge?