Issue #123, February 19, 2014
Confrontation is one of the most difficult and painful tasks of leadership and Paul didn’t like confrontation any better than we do. But when he recognized Peter’s hypocrisy Paul didn’t hold back. When Peter came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he was clearly in the wrong (Galatians 2:11). Paul’s rebuke was both bold and humble and serves as a guide to all servant leaders of how to effectively confront when it is needed.
Boldness enables personal confrontation.
It took great courage for Paul to confront Peter. In the last issue we examined Peter who boldly confronted the religious leaders as the church was born. He was the spokesperson for the church and Paul was a latecomer to the leadership team. Paul did not have seniority or position over Peter. All these factors make Paul’s courage more remarkable. But he did it boldly and in this case, publically.
It takes courage to confront sin in another person’s life and many leaders shrink from this task. Some hope that the problem will go away with time or that someone else will do the difficult task of confrontation. Some cultures find it more difficult to confront especially when the confrontation is directed at someone in a higher position. But Paul’s boldness lay in his understanding of the issues involved and his genuine love for Peter. Peter’s hypocrisy threatened to destroy the power of the Gospel to break down barriers between Jews and Gentiles. It was a sin issue, not personal preference or opinion. Servant leaders can absorb personal insults and accusations, but when sin is involved they need courage to confront. However, they confront to bring change, nor for personal revenge or vindication. Paul was not trying to undermine Peter’s leadership or to take his position. It was not a personality fight or an attempt to make himself look good by making Peter look bad. Paul genuinely cared for Peter and wanted the best for him. Servant leaders love enough to speak out rather than ignoring the problem. They humbly desire the best for those they serve. When this calls for confrontation, they do so boldly.
Humility brings perspective to the confrontation.
Paul boldly confronted Peter but he did so with humility and love. His intent was to correct and build, not to destroy. Just a few chapters later Paul reminds all servant leaders, Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted (Galatians 6:1).Paul teaches servant leaders that the goal of confrontation is restoration and for that to happen it must be done gently. Servant leaders humbly recognize that even when they are called to confront, they themselves are far from perfect and acknowledge that they could easily be on the other end of the confrontation. Because they have experienced God’s grace, they invite others to receive His grace. Their goal is to restore not to destroy. This perspective radically alters both the content and spirit of the confrontation. If confrontation is done with the intent to prove the other person wrong, to vindicate oneself, to shame another, or instill fear in others, the outcome will not be redemptive. The spirit in which confrontation is done often determines the outcome.
Some leaders are bold and don’t fear confronting others. But they do it with arrogance and pride which almost always leads to conflict. Other leaders are so “humble” they never confront with courage. Again, no change happens. Servant leaders are called to confront boldly but with the perspective of humility. When both are present, there is great potential that the confrontation will bring a positive change of heart. But regardless of the outcome, servant leaders approach confrontation with bold humility.
For further reflection and discussion:
- In my leadership, do I more naturally confront wrong or avoid conflict? What is the result? What is God calling me to change?
- Reflect on the last time you confronted someone. Did you do it with a spirit of humility? (If not, you likely need to go back and repent!) Was the issue you confronted a sin or just a difference of opinion between you and that person?
- What current relationship in your leadership needs confrontation? What are the reasons you have not already confronted? What does Paul’s example teach you and what is the step you need to take this week?
- In what way is confrontation an expression of love? Does lack of love lead you to avoid confrontation or to do it with the wrong perspective?
- In what way does your culture influence confrontation? In what ways does Paul’s example speak specifically to your culture?
- In this example Paul’s rebuke was public. When is this needed and when is it best to confront privately?