Issue #31, May 12, 2010
In the two previous issues we examined how to get trust and how to keep it. But what happens when trust is lost? Recovering trust is one of the most difficult tasks servant leaders can face. Three steps will start you on the journey.
Identify what happened.
Look for the reasons trust has been lost. Was it your mistake or a character failure? Did the failure come from a former leader or something that happened in the history of the group you now lead? Was it a single incident or a series of events that caused the followers to lose trust? Servant leaders take the time to look for answers to these questions so they can determine how to lead their group forward and rebuild trust.
Acknowledge mistakes.
After you identify what has happened, appropriately acknowledge the mistakes made by yourself or other leaders. The followers already know what happened; they only wonder if their leader will address the issue or not. Leaders often feel that we must maintain a role of perfection. Nothing is further from the truth. When leaders refuse to openly take personal responsibility for their failures they only deepen the deficit of trust. Based on the circumstances of your situation this may need to be done privately to a few individuals or at a public meeting. Servant leaders are willing to take the initiative to acknowledge what has gone wrong.
As you openly acknowledge the hurts from the past, prepare yourself to take the heat that will result. In cases where you have been wrong and failed, God will need to work in your life to rebuild your character and it will be a time of testing for you in your spiritual journey. When others were responsible for lost trust, some of the pain or anger that followers experienced may be directed at you. In any case you will be called to a greater depth of personal humility, a part of God’s plan to shape and strengthen your character. Servant leaders are willing to allow God to do this work in their lives.
Commit to rebuild.
Make a commitment to do whatever it takes to rebuild the trust of your followers. The process of restoring trust will test your commitment to God, others, and the process itself. Recognize that it will take time, even more time than it took to establish trust initially since now you begin from a deficit. There will likely be some resistance to overcome. You may need to seek reconciliation between yourself and those who have been hurt in the past or to bring together persons who have been directly involved in the situation that destroyed trust.
As you rebuild trust, lead with an open heart. Where trust has been destroyed people build walls of protection that are natural defense mechanisms to avoid further pain. Servant leaders recognize that followers find it difficult to trust a leader who is not open. They seek God’s grace to keep their heart open to followers and thereby model what it means to trust again. This may mean that you appropriately disclose what you are doing to rebuild trust or reveal some of the pain you are going through in the time of rebuilding trust.
Finally, servant leaders maintain hope that trust can be restored. God gives grace to trust again and the power to offer grace to those who need to regain their trust in us.
For further reflection and discussion:
- In places where trust has been broken, have I done all I can to restore trust?
- In my leadership context, what are the reasons trust has been lost? What has been the result of this loss? Which persons are most deeply impacted? What is the level of my current relationship with them?
- What is an appropriate way for me to acknowledge to my followers the loss of trust? How can I take personal responsibility for the restoration of trust with my followers?
- What key individuals do I need to meet with to begin rebuilding trust?